Go Back   AstinaGT Forums > AstinaGT Talk > Off Topic

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 19-01-2006, 02:51 PM   #21
shiv323
Junior Member
 
shiv323's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: C,Town Sydney
Posts: 113
Send a message via MSN to shiv323
got sent this link http://www.emotioneric.com/

if ur ever bored check it out i laughted for ages
shiv323 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 23-01-2006, 12:20 PM   #22
woofy
Senior Member
 
woofy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Melbourne
Car: Race Blue RS Octavia hatch, Black Santa Fe Elite
Posts: 826
watch the movie at http://www.cane-toad.com/

I loved what Baz says (or rather mouths when Victa comes along)

Last edited by woofy; 23-01-2006 at 12:23 PM.
woofy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-01-2006, 03:07 PM   #23
woofy
Senior Member
 
woofy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Melbourne
Car: Race Blue RS Octavia hatch, Black Santa Fe Elite
Posts: 826
http://www.cartoonland.de/archiv/war-is-not-the-answer/
woofy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-01-2006, 04:53 PM   #24
mrpayner
Senior Member
 
mrpayner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: -37.561609, 143.854814
Car: 2013 Mazda 6 GT Sedan - Soul Red
Posts: 3,517
How To Install a Poor-man's Security System:

Go to a second-hand store, buy a pair of men's used work boots, a really big pair.

Put them outside your front door on top of a copy of Guns and Ammo magazine.

Put a dog dish beside it. A really big dog dish.

Leave a note on your front door that says something like: "Bubba, big Mike and I have gone to get more ammunition - back in an hr." Don't disturb the pit bulls; they've just been de-wormed."
__________________

2013 Mazda6 Diesel GT ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Formerly] 2004 Mazda6 Luxury Sport
mrpayner is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-01-2006, 08:46 PM   #25
Rupewrecht
Administrator
 
Rupewrecht's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: melb.vic.au
Car: AZ-1, Astina Hardtop Turbo, BJ Protege, Beetle
Posts: 16,525
A woman went into a store to buy her husband a pet for his birthday. After looking around, she found that all the pets were very expensive. She told the clerk she wanted to buy a pet, but she didn't want to spend a fortune.

"Well," said the clerk, "I have a very large bullfrog. They say it's been trained to give blowjobs!" "Blowjobs!" the woman replied. "It hasn't been proven but we've sold 30 of them this month," he said. The woman thought it would be a great gag gift, and what if it's true... no more blowjobs for her! She bought the frog.

When she explained froggy's ability to her husband, he was extremely sceptical and laughed it off. The woman went to bed happy, thinking she may never need to perform this less than riveting act again.

In the middle of the night, she was awakened by the noise of pots and pans flying everywhere, making hellacious banging and crashing sounds. She ran downstairs to the kitchen, only to find her husband and the frog reading cookbooks. "What are you two doing at this hour?" she asked. The husband replied, "If I can teach this frog to cook, you're gone!'
__________________

jdmparts.rupewrecht.com
Sourcing your not-quite-overnight parts from Japan

WRECHT--|--SLOWTEGE--|--BEETLE--|--SUBSTITUTE--|--AZ-1


Rupewrecht is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-01-2006, 07:18 PM   #26
mrpayner
Senior Member
 
mrpayner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: -37.561609, 143.854814
Car: 2013 Mazda 6 GT Sedan - Soul Red
Posts: 3,517
http://www.youtube.com/player.swf?vi...57&s=B4BC76752
__________________

2013 Mazda6 Diesel GT ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------[Formerly] 2004 Mazda6 Luxury Sport
mrpayner is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28-01-2006, 11:16 AM   #27
SehnKhan
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: .
Car: .
Posts: 1,789

SehnKhan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 11:19 AM   #28
skippy
Resident Dissident
 
skippy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Ole Sydney Town
Car: Alfa 156 TS
Posts: 1,197
http://kalecoauto.com/
skippy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 05:21 PM   #29
AstinaBoiV6
Senior Member
 
AstinaBoiV6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Springwood MASSIVE Represent
Car: ba
Posts: 1,426
Send a message via MSN to AstinaBoiV6
hehe i like the im with stupid one... must have been rite timing and clothes for the day
__________________

Team AJ Member PM 4 details
AstinaBoiV6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 08:01 PM   #30
Drunknmonkeyau
Junior Member
 
Drunknmonkeyau's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 141
Send a message via MSN to Drunknmonkeyau
I got sent a link to this today.

Dunno if it's been posted before but i found it pretty damn funny
Drunknmonkeyau is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 08:04 PM   #31
Rupewrecht
Administrator
 
Rupewrecht's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: melb.vic.au
Car: AZ-1, Astina Hardtop Turbo, BJ Protege, Beetle
Posts: 16,525
After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe
sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The
mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, &
then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it
be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual
maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots & the solutions
recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major
airline that has never had an accident.

----------------------------------------
(P= The problem logged by the pilot.)
(S= The solution and action taken by mechanics.)
************************************************** **********************

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
>----------------------------------------
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
----------------------------------------
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
----------------------------------------
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.
----------------------------------------
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute
descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
----------------------------------------
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
----------------------------------------
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
----------------------------------------
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.
----------------------------------------
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
----------------------------------------
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.
----------------------------------------
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
----------------------------------------
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, & be serious.
----------------------------------------
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
----------------------------------------
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
----------------------------------------
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget
pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget
__________________

jdmparts.rupewrecht.com
Sourcing your not-quite-overnight parts from Japan

WRECHT--|--SLOWTEGE--|--BEETLE--|--SUBSTITUTE--|--AZ-1


Rupewrecht is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 08:13 PM   #32
bourbon
The Hairy Mod
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: southside ya'll and North Side, Brissy
Car: MINI Cooper S 2003
Posts: 8,110
I LIKE MONKEYS
The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece. I thought that odd since they were normally a couple thousand each. I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth. I bought 200. I like monkeys.
I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one drive. His name was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in their genitals. I laughed. Then they punched my genitals. I stopped laughing.
I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new environment. They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at high speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the spectacle lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.
Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive: they all died. No apparent reason. They all just sorta' dropped dead. Kinda' like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later. Damn cheap monkeys.
I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my room, on the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase. It looked like I had 200 throw rugs.
I tried to flush one down the toilet. It didn't work. It got stuck. Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.
I tried pretending that they were just stuffed animals. That worked for a while, that is until they began to decompose. It started to smell real bad.
I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want to call the plumber. I was embarrassed.
I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them. Unfortunately there was only enough room for two monkeys at a time so I had to change them every 30 seconds. I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so it didn't all go bad.
I tried burning them. Little did I know my bed was flammable. I had to extinguish the fire.
Then I had one dead, wet monkey in my toilet, two dead, frozen monkeys in my freezer, and 197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed. The odor wasn't improving.
I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys and to use the bathroom. I severely beat one of my monkeys. I felt better.
I tried throwing them way but the garbage man said that the city wasn't allowed to dispose of charred primates. I told him that I had a wet one. He couldn't take that one either. I didn't bother asking about the frozen ones.
I finally arrived at a solution. I gave them out as Christmas gifts. My friends didn't know quite what to say. They pretended that they like them but I could tell they were lying. Ingrates. So I punched them in the genitals.
I like monkeys
__________________
For All your crash repair panels & lights, clear lights contact us at
PANEL HOUSE 45 RANDALL ST SLACKS CREEK QLD 4127
PHONE : 07 3808 8737 FAX : 07 3808 8735
bourbon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 11:00 PM   #33
AstinaBoiV6
Senior Member
 
AstinaBoiV6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Springwood MASSIVE Represent
Car: ba
Posts: 1,426
Send a message via MSN to AstinaBoiV6
ahahah nice man i loved the part where he gets hit in the genitals im still laughing
__________________

Team AJ Member PM 4 details
AstinaBoiV6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-01-2006, 11:17 PM   #34
bourbon
The Hairy Mod
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: southside ya'll and North Side, Brissy
Car: MINI Cooper S 2003
Posts: 8,110
yeah that monkey story is a classic...its the only thing i fully read :P
__________________
For All your crash repair panels & lights, clear lights contact us at
PANEL HOUSE 45 RANDALL ST SLACKS CREEK QLD 4127
PHONE : 07 3808 8737 FAX : 07 3808 8735
bourbon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-02-2006, 07:58 PM   #35
Rupewrecht
Administrator
 
Rupewrecht's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: melb.vic.au
Car: AZ-1, Astina Hardtop Turbo, BJ Protege, Beetle
Posts: 16,525
[img]http://upshizzle.com/files/****ingmoran.gif[/img]

A korean Takumii?
__________________

jdmparts.rupewrecht.com
Sourcing your not-quite-overnight parts from Japan

WRECHT--|--SLOWTEGE--|--BEETLE--|--SUBSTITUTE--|--AZ-1


Rupewrecht is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-02-2006, 09:00 PM   #36
CityEnd
Senior Member
 
CityEnd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Melbourne
Car: .
Posts: 915
http://youtube.com/w/Arnold-Rave?v=hH6Z8M__Gms

inz inz inz....
CityEnd is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-02-2006, 09:24 AM   #37
Red Frog
Senior Member
 
Red Frog's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Shepherds Bush, London BABY
Car: My feet :p
Posts: 1,292
Wailing works for lovelorn humpbacks
SMH - February 3, 2006 - 8:24AM

People have often used song to attract the opposite sex. Now, whales are crooning for love.
A team of researchers from the University of Queensland (UQ) has found proof that male humpback whales spend many hours "singing" in a bid to woo potential partners.
The group has spent the past three years tracking and recording whales during the annual migration season off Peregian Beach, on Queensland's Sunshine Coast, in September and October.

The researchers - UQ PhD student Joshua Smith and his supervisor Dr Michael Noad - confirmed that singing males spent more quality time with females.
They said the songs, which can last up to 23 hours and are mainly made up of chirps, helped sexual interaction between whales.
"Songs appear to be directed more towards females possibly as a courtship and mating display than a signal to warn off or repel rival males," Mr Smith said.

"Singers are joining females with calves more often and singing for a much longer duration with them than any other social group.
"The characteristics of the song are possibly being used by the female to assess these males."
The UQ team is the first research group to provide a link between song and courtship in whales.

So boys, if you want to attract that female you've had your eye on, get some singing lessons!! lol
__________________
I don't need drugs. I'm just high on twisties
Red Frog is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-02-2006, 12:49 PM   #38
AstinaBoiV6
Senior Member
 
AstinaBoiV6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Springwood MASSIVE Represent
Car: ba
Posts: 1,426
Send a message via MSN to AstinaBoiV6
bahahah that arnold rave is funny as......
__________________

Team AJ Member PM 4 details
AstinaBoiV6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-02-2006, 12:57 PM   #39
woofy
Senior Member
 
woofy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Melbourne
Car: Race Blue RS Octavia hatch, Black Santa Fe Elite
Posts: 826
ninja love

http://www.youtube.com/w/Ask-A-Ninja...?v=bnM0NRnoWgs

Last edited by woofy; 03-02-2006 at 04:13 PM.
woofy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-02-2006, 05:30 PM   #40
Red Frog
Senior Member
 
Red Frog's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Shepherds Bush, London BABY
Car: My feet :p
Posts: 1,292
Yahoo's 'Finds of the Year' announced, and they awarded http://www.netdisaster.com the Best Innovative Website prize. The website provides fed-up web surfers with a variety of options to let go of steam, including throwing virtual cow dung or a meteor shower over websites of their choice. There's 29 different modes to choose from

Here's a sample: (hehehe btw Mods, I really don't mean this! AGT rulz )
Is this how you feel?
__________________
I don't need drugs. I'm just high on twisties
Red Frog is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
funny things i've been sent lately Rupewrecht General Automotive Talk 795 14-12-2005 07:03 PM
fuel guage acting funny? woofy Performance & General Maintenance 7 22-03-2005 11:06 PM
long but funny laugh KittyKatSmack General Automotive Talk 2 16-12-2004 04:05 PM
Weird 323f's/Astina/Lantis' - Or stupid things? mrpayner General Automotive Talk 30 04-06-2004 11:58 AM
VERY funny cyber... YOU MUST READ THIS!!! LantisV6 NZ General Automotive Talk 2 26-05-2003 09:02 AM


All times are GMT +10. The time now is 09:16 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
2001- 2010 AstinaGT